October 19, 2011

While I'm Away ...

I'm taking a well deserved few days off at my favorite getaway, "The Shrublands" for some rest and relaxation, as well as a major de-tox.  So I've asked a special lady to fill in for me with her own special brand of insight and humor.

Actually, I originally asked famed star of stage and screen Richard Dreyfus to write today's post, as he had done such an admirable job for me several years ago, but repeated calls to his office were not returned.  Funny how your friends turn on you in your hour of need.

Asshole ...

Anyway, Ms Nelda DuMont, although not a star of stage and screen, is pretty notable in her own right.  Nelda is a regular contributor to Ladies Home Journal, Woman's Day and Juggs magazines.  In addition, her weekly column "Housewife Humor" runs monthly in the Perth Amboy Sun-Patriot.  And if that weren't enough ...  Nelda's book "The Rug Is Always Yellower Under The Dog" was on the NYT best seller list for an amazing 47 weeks in 1971.

Please give Nelda your undivided attention, won't you?

REMEMBER THAT TV commercial where Josephine the lady plumber helps her friend who's visiting from St. Louis clean that old New York apartment house sink with kitchen cleanser, and the friend says she'd better take some of that cleanser back home with her because "We've got some pretty old sinks in St. Louis, too"?  Well, I always get a kick out of that because I live in St. Louis and we do have some pretty old sinks, although ours is practically new.

YOU KNOW WHAT tickles me?  The kids will spend all day Saturday picking up newspapers for the school paper drive, but just try to get them to pick up the clothes in their room!  My husband's the same way.  He gets hotter than heck if I borrow any of his tools and leave them in the kitchen junk drawer or under the sink instead of putting them back on the pegboard over his workbench in the basement, but then he'll turn around and leave his clothes all over the bedroom.  Aren't husbands something?   And kitchen junk drawers - now that I've mentioned it, I have to laugh when I think what a mess ours is.  Isn't yours?

MY LITTLE NEPHEW  Bobby, my sister Mildred's youngest boy (he's 1 1/2 ), said the funniest thing the other day.  He always says "wa-wa" when he wants water.  And the other day he said, "Can I have a glass of wa-wa?"  So my sister said "Don't say 'wa-wa,' say 'water.'"  And Bobby said to her "But I can't say 'water,' I can only say 'wa-wa!'"  Isn't that the funniest thing you ever heard?

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