July 17, 2010

Eye Of The Storm

There is an unwritten rule known by almost every homeowner that states "If you complete one improvement project, the rest of the house automatically looks like shit."

A few weeks ago, we had all new windows put in our home that we had built especially for us (so did about 40 other people) 23 years ago.  As is the case with builder grade crap used to construct new homes, they should have been replaced 20 years ago.  But there was always an excuse not to do it, and by excuse, I mean money.  No matter what the smiley faced Feldco man says on TV about half-off windows, free installation or a new car with your purchase, they end up costing a good chunk of change.

Being responsible individuals, we contacted three contractors for bids.  The first guy was about 120 years old and we really didn't want him dying in our house, particularly with only half the windows finished, so he was out.  The next two offered the same brand of windows at roughly the same price.  One contractor informed us proudly that he used only Pole installers and not Mexicans.  This puzzled me somewhat, but maybe Poles are born with window installation in their blood, making them the clear genetic choice for the job.  The second contractor brought in a portfolio 10 inches thick. But instead of pictures of his previous jobs, it contained all manor of commendations, including a Better Business Bureau "good guy" certificate, the Presidential Medal of Freedom and the Iron Cross.  Jan was so impressed, that she insisted that he do the work.  Besides, I think she had a crush on him.

So, on the appointed day, the crew showed up.  And they were all ... Polish.  Maybe there is something in the genes.  Anyway, two days and a lot of hammering and Polish cursing later, they pounded their last nail, packed up, and left.

Holy Shit!

Stosh and Stosh Jr. Are Up To The Task

Finishing Up

And with nothing left of the crew except a faint whiff of kielbasa farts, Jan and I surveyed the work.  And it was good.

But the shades and blinds we had pulled down and planned to re-install were not so good.  With new windows, all of a sudden they looked like something out of an Alabama trailer park.  So all new drapes and rods were ordered and installed.  Then the bedroom was the wrong color, so we painted that.  Then the closet doors in the bedroom looked like shit, so we installed new ones. Then the wall art looked all wrong, so we bought all new.

And at approximately 3 P.M. this afternoon, after 3 weeks ... we installed the last door knob, and hung the last picture.  But our rest is short lived.

Because early next week, a new crew arrives to tear our bathroom down to the stud walls and build it back again from the ground up.

And even though I know it will look great when it's done in two weeks ...

I'm sure as shit something else won't.

1 comment:

  1. You should have just went out and purchased a new home. Probably would have been much cheaper. ;)