September 01, 2010

Thoughts On The First Day Of Fall

Yeah, that's right.  This is the first day of meteorological Fall.  And meteorological is the only way we roll in this house, so even though it's 100 degrees and 80 percent relative humidity outside, get out and party like it's 1999.  Besides, if you think about it, traditional Fall lasts all the way up until 3 days before Christmas, and who the fuck wants that?  So change your way of thinking and you can thank me on December 1st, when the first day of meteorological Winter is upon us.

Notable on this date in 1940, the German army under the artistic direction of the Kaiser crossed the Polish border, and the word Blitzkrieg (where are the kolachkes) was burned into the human lexicon.  There is something I have to admit here.  For most of my adult life, I was under the impression that Poland was west of Germany. About 10 years ago at a cocktail party, it was pointed out to me (with the use of visual aids), that Poland was actually east of Germany.  I was humiliated to say the least, and cursed my Junior High Geography teacher for spending more time emphasizing that South Dakota was not on top of North Dakota than he did showing us the location of Poland.

But as embarrassed as I was at the time, at least I didn't make the bonehead mistake that the producers of the 1969 blockbuster film "Kratatoa, East of Java" made, when half-way through production, someone pointed out to them that Krakatoa was actually west of Java. Fearing a marketing nightmare, the powers that be kept this fact hush-hush, and amazingly, no one in the viewing public figured it out until years later.

Are You Sure??

During my lunch break today, I stumbled across a shocking article in one of the local newspapers.  It seems that one of the large pharmaceutical houses in our area had run out a drug, of which they are the sole manufacturer,  called sodium thiopental.  Now, Mr. & Mrs. Joe Citizen may read this and say in unison, "Who gives a flying fuck?", but for needle happy prison executioners across the country, this is bad news because sodium thiopental is a major component in the "cocktail" that they mix up for lethal injections.

The Pharmaceutical House in question is not very keen on having it known that they produce such a substance and point out that using it to kill people is definitely "off label".  In fact, one company official contacted about the story effectively dodged the question by sticking his fingers in his ears and shouting "LaLaLaLaLa" at the top of his lungs.  Others though, did admit that they would replenish their stocks sometime next year, or whenever the stink blows over, whichever comes first.

So even though there are some unhappy prison officials out there right now, I'll bet there are more than a few death row inmates who will drift off to slumberland tonight with a little smile on their faces.

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