September 08, 2011

Maintenance Day

I was planning to do a "letters" post today, but I became sidetracked about 5 minutes after I woke up  this morning.  It would require too much thought anyway, so I'll just save that for another time and go with this ... whatever it turns out to be.

I'm attempting to get the outside of the house ready for winter, but really can't decide what's important and what's not.  Jan was bitching at me the other day to reseal the front porch, so I spent most of yesterday doing that.  It came out all splotchy, which pissed me off royally, but she said it looked "rustic", so I guess I'll go with that and just wait for Mother Nature to strip it off during the winter.  I need to paint some of the house trim, but the urge hasn't hit me yet.  Since I have a month or so before the weather gets too bad to do it, I'll let that slide for a while, along with the side door to the garage that I promised myself I would do in July.

So, rather than do that hard shit, I'm spending the afternoon trying to get my mini laptop to work right again.  You remember those things, right?  They were all the rage two years ago, but just like the dinosaurs, they disappeared.  The one I have is a Dell Mini something-or-other.  So far, I've spent about 3 hours trying to clear enough memory on it to run.  I don't know if I'll be successful or not.

While I'm waiting for that thing to try and clear itself, I've been reading up on the correct way to sell my unwanted shit on Craigslist.  Our basement looks like an episode of "Hoarders", only with decent, hardly ever used stuff stacked all over the place.  From the advice articles that I've read so far, it appears that I don't want to give anyone my phone number, use an e-mail address that gives any of my real information or let anyone in the house.  I should also be ready to defend myself when someone comes to look at the merchandise, or better still, just drive to a well lit location with said merchandise and act like you would if you were making a drug deal.  I'd have a garage sale, but I can't stand the thought of bartering with a bunch of cheap shits trying to get something for nothing.  This is the same reason I don't go to garage sales.  Maybe I'm better off to just get a dumpster in and throw it all away.  Or better yet, drive around until I find someone else's dumpster and throw it in there.

I'm also editing out some of the blogs I'm following.  Well, not some of them, just one. I was reading a blog by one young woman for some time, but whatever originality and freshness she once possessed seems to have turned into a "dig me" kind of thing in the last couple of months.  "Oooooh, I won the award for best young blogger in (fill in name of shithole city here), Ooooh, I'm making a movie with my boyfriend".  Fuck ... give me a break.  She's just as annoying on Twitter.

Of course, as is well known, I'm the epitome of originality and freshness.

In other news not relating to me, was anybody aware that Lindsay Lohan has a sister? For that matter, does anybody remember Lindsay Lohan?  I guess someone does.  I tend to get Lindsay and Jessica Simpson mixed up.  I think she has a sister too (Ashley?).  Anyway, Lindsay has a sister named Ali, and the gossip rags this morning are all gaga over her apparently having had some type of face rearrangement procedure done.  Observe:

Before ... And After.  Or Maybe It's The Other Way Around?

So, did she change her eyes?  Forehead?  Lips?  Nose?  Teeth?  Vagina?  Who can say?  Personally, I think a mistake was made and the thing on the right is actually Ashley Simpson.  And by the way, Jessica Simpson was quoted in Us Magazine today as saying "I love my boobies!"  Why this woman has eluded marriage for a second time is beyond me.

Okay, enough rambling.  My Dell Mini has informed me that it doesn't have enough memory left to delete enough memory to keep it running.

You have to love planned obsolescence technology.


  1. Thank you! So are you ... thanks for reading.

  2. Holy cow, that "after" pic makes her look like she's about 95. Yikes.

    And you might want to stay away from craigslist, unless you have an extremely high tolerance for crazy people. I just donate my stuff to the Salvation Army now.