They Roam The Streets

The other morning, I pulled into my driveway after going out for junk I thought I needed.  As I was unloading the truck, I caught a movement out of the corner of my eye and looked up to see a young guy, about 22,  bounding up the drive wearing a t-shirt, shorts and tennis shoes. I'll call him Alvin, because I never did get his name.

Alvin:  Don't beam me up Scotty! (I guess I looked startled)

Me:  What do you want?

Alvin:  Good morning sir!

Me:  What do you want?

Alvin:  Has there been a girl come up to your door this morning?

Me:  No.  What do you want?

Alvin:  Well, I'm a college student, and I'm playing in sort of a scavenger contest with a bunch of other young people, and the winner gets a 2,000 dollar scholarship to college.  So I need your help.

Me:  What do you want?

Alvin:  Well, to get in the spirit of the contest, I need you to inspire me.  So, what do you do for a living?

Me:  Nothing.  I haven't worked for two years.  Go away son.

At that, I turned around and walked into the house.  I heard him chirp "Thank you!" as I went in the door, and expected that to be followed with "asshole", but it wasn't.

Several hours later, I went out again and saw Alvin standing on a street corner near the house.  He must have recognized the truck, because he stared at me kind of sullenly.  After I passed him, I looked in the rear view mirror just in time to see him finger me.

He must have been having a bad day trying to be "inspired" by ill-tempered old men.