My cousin Judy (aka "Weirdo"), who I hadn't seen or talked to in 40 years, contacted me some time back via e-mail, wanting some information concerning the family tree she was putting together. Turns out, she wanted to know the names of my Mom and Dad. Now, this woman had been to our house numerous times as a teenager, and I distinctly remember mater and pater being there during those visits. So, in my reply, I expressed my best wishes that the remainder of her acid trip was as pleasant as the first part, and to never contact me again.
My mother told me later that Judy had determined that I am part Pawnee Indian, but considering the source, it's just as likely that I am part sea otter.
In my mind, what seems way more fun than taking years to find the origins of my family, is to take an afternoon or so and make up a family tree of a fictitious character. I can just see Ian Fleming sitting at a country club bar somewhere in Burma, getting slowly sloshed on gin and tonics while mapping out his favorite character's genealogy on a cocktail napkin.
Take a look ...
And I thought I knew my James Bond. I know who Kissy Suzuki is, but "Shrinking" Violet Holmes? Also, James had a brother Henry! I wonder if they called him Hank?
On closer inspection, it appears as if this family tree wasn't put together by Ian Fleming, but by some chap named Win Scott Eckert. This looks like some sort of literary infringement to me. If I were Ian, I'd sue.
Except he's dead, so that probably isn't going to happen.